Turn the grill on ‘High’. Come back in and turn every radio and
television to the race with the volume all the way up. Run back out
and dump 10 pounds of rubber bands on the grill. Bring the grill
inside. Sit in front of the television with chicken wings and longnecks.
Throw chicken bones at the screen for full effect.
If the smell of
rubber ain’t enough for us to find our way back to Chez Ellis,
home of Rednecks & Red Rhônes, then following the line of tanker
trucks and sireens to the column of smoke from the grill sure as hell
is.
It might be Speed Week, but with Jimmie on the pole and Gordon
along side, our only enthusiasm came from the idea of having an American
made car blow the doors off the Gibbs team’s rice guzzlers.
 Just
as the Great American Race has a week’s worth of qualifying with speed
and gearheads, Rednecks & Red Rhônes has developed its own brand of
qualifying. And just as rac’n accommodates a unique perspective on
cheat’n, it wouldn’t be Rednecks & Red Rhônes if someone didn’t try to
condition their liver ahead of the real event in order to out-last the
other track-watchers. This year Col. Bob Cuozzi descended on
Greg and Tami Ellis for a Friday qualifier consisting of, among
other things, Kongsgaard Chardonnay Napa 2005 and Araujo Cabernet
Sauvignon Eisele Vineyard Napa 1994. They proclaimed the latter “real
good,” but, I had serious suspicions that they’d suffered impaired
judgment. Had this been that political love-fest of the Democratic
primaries, you would hear Hillary - that lifelong NASCAR fan -
say, “I have no personal knowledge of excessive drinking by these two
fine men, but they are free to wantonly imbibe as they please in the
privacy of their own home, not that there’s anything wrong with that.”
But this weren’t politics, this is RAC’N, and a damn sight more
important.
With four bottles under their belts from their Friday Happy Hour
session, I join them on Saturday for the final qualification round. But
it seems I arrive a squinch late, for what is left of the Kongsgaard is
a’running on fumes:
Kongsgaard Chardonnay Napa 2005 (2nd day)
Deep gold with a coconut nose and a rich, brioche-like quality with a
pineapple-tropical fruit finish. It’s rich; it’s over the top; it’s
delicious.... and about as fat as Tony Stewart at a BBQ. If it
were any fatter, it would be more like Fat Albert say’n - “heeey,
heeEY, HEEEY!” 14.1% alc. ... I don’t want to say it is too hot with
alcohol like jet fuel, but Michael Waldrup was seen siphon’n out
the last drops from the bottle. Find this wine
To keep the lap averages up high, we need to build a good base. Between
Greg’s bread and goat cheeses of Fleur Verte (chevre), Le Chevrot (chevre),
Montenebro (chevre) and Tomme du Laveron, we line up:
 Peter
Michael Winery L’Apres-Midi Sauvignon Blanc Sonoma County 1998 (from
magnum)
Color of honey comb or pale lemon. Nose of marmalade, petrol,
“grapefruit with a waxy component,” says the Colonel. White peaches and
apricots and ....and ...some creamed corn. We cannot find any notes
suggesting that Semillion is in the mix, but we strongly suspect it’s in
there. This is balanced and elegant with not a hint of the 14.1% alc.
Two and a half hours after opening it, it hasn’t moved a bit; just as
solid as it ever was. It matches well with all of the chevre cheeses and
Tomme du Laveron, but is best with the Fleur Verte. Find this wine
Arietta “On the White Keys” California 2005
Another white “Bordeaux-inspired” (per the website) blend of Sauvignon
Blanc and Semillon; the first ever white wine for Arietta. With fruit
from Sonoma Mountain and old vine Semillon from Carneros. A blend of
stainless and cask fermented wine resulting in about 350 cases. At any
rate, a pale lemon yellow with a muted or tight nose of beeswax,
gooseberry and cut grass. 14.1% alc. It goes a’want’n for company. Find this wine
Steve and Barb South arrive just in time to join us for some of
Bob’s “salmon helper” consisting of shredded salmon with white sauce,
penne pasta, mushrooms etc. It might not be as good as the ole lady’s
tuna helper, see’n as how it weren’t as greasy, but it fills the pot.
 To
keep from runn’n outta gas, we decide to open up on the qualifying theme
for the evening . . . Cali Pinots! What with all the talk on the boards
over the past 18 months of Cali Pinots being more like Syrah, we decide
to take an ed-je-da-kate’d approach to the issue to see if the Left
Coast vignerons might have been bogart’n a touch while practic’n their
punch downs. We power’d up with:
Loring Wine Company
Cargasacchi Pinot Noir Santa Rita Hills 2004
The color is not as deep as the Bonaccorsi, but its royal purple
provides ample flash and gilt. The cola and vanilla flavors dominate the
palate, but the mouthfeel is much, much lighter than the Bonaccorsi; not
that it’s a lightweight by any stretch of the imagination, not with
15.1% alc....gulp! But it slips down pit road and onto the track without
a bit of hotness. Brian’s other wines may suffer hot flashes, but the
Cargasacchi is balanced. Find this wine
Bonaccorsi Pinot Noir Santa
Rita Hills 2004
Deep, dark red fruits with brown sugar/molasses and cola, vanilla and
chocolate. Greg says herbaceous... but, the Colonel and I disagree.
House rules being what they are, however, ... allowances are made. This
is a rich red, with incredible fruit, well structured....maybe a bit
hot, but as time goes by it carries it well. A bit too well, as the
bottle is quickly drained.. 14.3% alc. Find this wine
That we devised to enjoy two Cargasacchi Pinots from the same vintage
from two different producers is no coincidence. We done thunk it up by
ourselves even. A fairly solid, but not blockbuster vintage as the ‘04
allows us to see just what these two producers can do, and “do” they
did. Both are wines we highly recommend, but for two of us, the edge
goes to the Bonaccorsi for its structure and fruit that will give this
wine a long life.
Kistler Kistler Vineyard Russian River Valley Pinot Noir 1996
Stewed tomatoes, plums, chocolate in the finish. This wine is in d’Cline.
While it is by no means dead, it’s about like Kenney Wallace’s
career ....it’s sooner to be over and not at all likely to be on the
upswing in the next... kinda like we wish Kurt Busch’s career
would soon be. ‘Bout the only comparison this wine has to Kurt, however,
is that he’s more likely to take flight successfully. Some sediment.
14.1% alc. Find this wine
And then some yahoo, who clearly didn’t read the memo about
CALI-FOUR-NAH Pinot, mistakenly pulls out
 Michel
Gros Vosne-Romanee 1990
This is much lighter bodied than any of the Calis, but the nose, ...
man, it’s got a bigger nose! Strawberry and mushrooms... if the two
flavors could be folded into a omelette, this would be it. Maybe it’s
not as balanced as it could be, but since this group of Rednecks is
already unbalanced, no one complains. No ma’m! 12.5% alc.
Find this wine
Domaine
Drouhin-Laroze Latrichieres-Chambertin Grand Cru 1999
A deeper color than the Gros Vosne-Romanee. Tight nose and palate, but
showing mushroom, raspberry, earth and eventually, a bit of strawberry.
This is a wine that needs food. And see’n as how we’d already bellied up
plenty and let our belts out a notch, no one angles over to the stove.
13% alc. Find this wine
Well, ya can’t compare the idea of Cali Pinot being LIKE Syrah, without
actually DRINK’N some Syrah. Sacrificing one from the box he’d just
liberated, the Colonel leads the charge into:
 Carlisle
Papa’s Block Syrah Russian River Valley 2005
A very Cote-Rotie styled wine. Not that this is copying another style,
for it is distinct unto its own good self. But the fragrance of bacon,
grilled meat and lavender reminds us of the Cote. The only problem with
this is that it is waaaay too young.
Mike Officer’s
distinction as a winemaker shows through the nuance and depth of the
flavors. 155 cases. 15.2% alc. It is one fine Pinot, uh, Syrah.
Find this wine
We declare ourselves a right more ed-je-da-cate’d on the topic of Cali
Pinot and proclaim that as big and smack-daddy bold as they might be,
they ain’t Syrah; no way, no how (which if you type real fast comes out:
“no wy, no ho” which reminds us of both Don Ho and rap songs at
the same time ... sorta....) But the room fills with the music of Joe
Henderson "Double Rainbow" and Pat Metheny "Still Life
Talking" just about the time we are about saturated.
Well, if Trace Adkins had a-been play’n in the parlor, he’d be sing’n
“Slap your grandma; there outta be a law,” ‘cause ‘bout this time The
Greg came saunter’n in with:
Araujo Cabernet Sauvignon Eisele Vineyard Napa 1994 (2nd night)
Deep and plummy, in fact, almost inky in color with a nose of cassis,
mushroom, raspberry. But then, on the palate....big, oaky dill pickle
and more oak. 13.5% alc. This stuff is about as close to qualify’n as
A.J. Allmendinger! Find this wine
The Colonel brought order back to the ranks when he doses everyone with:
 Taylor’s
Quinta de Vargellas Port 1967
Not a declared year. A “single quinta” or single vineyard port. Atypical
for the Taylor style in that it’s lighter in color and body. Fully
resolved and a robust wine. An after dinner coffee without the coffee
with added elements of smoke and mulberry. The Colonel proclaims this
has “No heat.” According to him, and who better should know, this is one
of the better Taylors, bested only by the 1955. Alcohol level: “high” Find this wine
Now, that last note does not reflect your scribe’s point of view. But
it’s a scooch hard to jot down descriptors when your perspective is the
underside of the dinin’ room table, especially when it’s spinning like
pasties at the Velvet Club on Coyote Ugly Night when the General
Assembly is meet’n, bless their hearts. At some point, the pit crew
delivers me home.
Nine o’clock this Sunday seems to come earlier than most days. Lying in
bed watching CMT videos of Reba with the one eye that would
focus, I realize the lessons of the previous night’s events are learned
at great cost. Thirty minutes later, I manage to move the remote enough
to change the channel to find something to lift me up and brighten my
outlook. The middle portion of the movie “A Beautiful Mind” -
when Nash’s world is collapsing all about him - is as cheery as I hope
to aspire.
But with daylight burn’n on race day, I know’d The Walmarts Super
Store would be hop’n with eager Rednecks making a last minute run on
the best Chinese imports of NASCAR knock-off shlock that the collapsing
dollar can buy. Remembering my uncle who would travel I-81 visiting
every Walmarts at every exit between Salem and Bristol, Virginia
because, “they're all so different,” I want to shop another Walmarts.
But see’n as how my coupons allow for only a bag of pork rinds and a
super size, jumbo jar of peanut butter (which would be nice as an
appetizer to some anticipated chicken wings), I step out of Redneck
Bazaar (The Walmarts, that is) and high-tail it to Chez Ellis. Greg
appears disappointed at the prospect of missing out on some pork rinds.
Thankfully, I’d unloaded a mess of stinky cheese the day before
consisting of Gorgonzola Dolce (blue), Valdeon (blue), Morbier (cow),
Appalachian (cow), Fleur Verte (chevre), Le Chevrot (chevre), Montenebro
(chevre), Pont L’Eveque, Tomme du Laveron and Pinve Vecchio. Throw in
some of that Batali Salumi Mole and as good as the rinds and PJ
mighty be, they’ll just have to wait for another race, like Bristol
perhaps.
Making my way back to Chez Ellis weren’t hard. Why, with a regular
appearance of an empty bottle along side the road, most any GPS mapper
would have been proud to use ‘em to leading the pack to trackside.
Despite the numbness in my head, I arrive a bit earlier than most, but
apparently not early enough. Bob is hankering for a rac’n preview. By 10
we couldn’t hold him back any more. The corks flew fast and soon we are
into:
Kongsgaard Viorous Napa Valley 2006
A blend of Viognier and Rousanne loaded with the fragrance of peach,
apricot and leechee nuts. Different, however, on the palate with
almonds, ginger. A wine that cries for food and with the ginger sausage,
it is spectacularly wonderful. 14.1%. Find this wine
Next up, we interview a rookie.
 Stolpman
L’Avion Santa Ynez Valley 2005
A blend of Rousanne and 2% Sauvignon Blanc producing a stunning wine
reminiscent of a Beaucastel Vielles Vines, but juicer and bigger. Apple,
leechee nut, smoke and white flowers continuously roll out of the glass.
A poor man’s Rousanne . . . only as long as we keep word of this wine to
ourselves. The color shows a tinge of green on the edge of the yellow
apple core. 14.1% alc. This is one fine drive. Sashi and the rest
of the gang at Stolpman are a Rousanne team to watch. Mark my
words on that. Find this wine
But as good as these are, they are about like hearing the Seldom
Scene when Ralph Stanley is the act you came for. “Urban
bluegrass” ain’t the real thing, just like Cali Rhone look a-likes ain’t
Chave. With Quicksilver Messenger Service singing "Happy
Trails...” in our background, in front of us on the tube Junior
Johnson marshals the crowd, then, as Richard Petty waves the
green flag, we are off as if on a mission from God Hisself:
 Jean-Louis
Chave Hermitage (Blanc) 1989
100% Marsanne. Greg, the Colonel and I threw it into high gear. Coming
out of the first corner, the Colonel took the lead and pronounces the
wine “Sublime.” Greg pulls up into second with the comment of, “I don’t
think I drink enough white Hermitage.” But the wine became a bit
controversial with others subsequently liking it and others thinking
it’s done. Somewhat reductive on the nose, but not nearly as much as the
‘96 (see below). Those that like the wine find it to be clean, balanced
and fully mature with lanolin and muted floral notes with focused
flavors of apple and ginger in the palate. Bob sums it up with, “This is
why you age a great white Hermitage.” 13% alc. Find this wine
As we enjoy this first Chave Blanc, Steve and Barb South rejoin us. Soon
follows: Bill Hampton, Jeff and Dena Morris, Brown
Councill, Michael and Adair Ross and John Rousso. Just
like watch’n and tailgat’n from the infield, these rednecks get right
down to it, reach’n for glasses, pos’n in their NASCAR best and
discuss’n pit strategy.
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Blanc) 1996
100% Marsanne. Decanted for 5 hours. Smoky oxidation on the nose or is
that just a reductive quality .... or is there a difference? But for the
abundance of other Chave present, we would’ve discussed this for a long
time. The wine may not be off in any way, but the funkiness never quite
goes away. The color is light yellow. The palate is full, but not as big
as most of the other Chave Blancs, save for the ‘02. Flavors of baked
apple, beeswax, wild flower/orange blossom and lanolin shine through the
funk. It’s a lighter bodied wine than the ‘04 and perhaps the ‘02 as
well. The lines are crisp and clean with the palate showing more acidity
than you’d expect.....if you didn’t drink Chave Blanc weekly. Long in
the finish with great viscosity. 13% alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Blanc) 2002
100% Marsanne. The biggest and bestest nose of all the Chave Blancs,
with a bright yellow apple color.
Fully approachable with lychee nut, beeswax, locust blossoms and citrus
notes. If this is an academic
exercise, then it is just another chapter of a textbook example of why
producer trumps vintage in a bad vintage. Probably a wine to enjoy
anytime over the next 10 years. 13% alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Blanc) 2004
100% Marsanne. An inviting but reticent wine with white flowers, citrus
notes with distinct tangerine and an “oiliness” (meant in a good way.)
(Jeff gets a little chicken wing in the nose.) The acidity is not as
sharp as the ‘96, but sharper than the ‘89. The depth, length and fruit
are showing only a hint of what this will someday become. A solid Chave,
that will outshine most any white it encounters sometime in the future.
In short, it’s just way too early to open this wine. A fairly intense
wine that has a looong life ahead of it. 14.5% alc. Find this wine
 As
the pit stops start to occur, we turn what’s left of our minds to the
abundance of Chave Rouge collect’n on the table. After all, while we may
stand up when we hear the name “Petty,” we don’t plan on
lollygagging around the track the way Kyle seems to be do’n in
every race. But before we take a hold of the glassware with both hands,
we find a surprise on the table. That fellow NASCAR aficionado Cletus
(left), (who joined us in ‘05), but is somewhat new to wine, has
sent, by way of couns’n Brown, a wine he hopes might fit the theme. Poor
Cletus, he know’d that we’d had some conversations ‘bout Cali Pinots
being like Syrah and he meant well enough, but the boy sent the
following to a Chave-fest!
Martinelli Pinot Noir Reserve Russian River Valley 2000
A Helen Turley made wine, bespeaking of classic California Pinot.
Cherry, cola, (but not cherry-cola), vanilla... truly New World style
with loads of Dolly Parton fruit. Some earth, but
clearly New World. Bold, clean, fun and ....well, ... it - like Robbie
Gordon - just won’t last a long time. Drink now. Find this wine
In honor of Cletus, we drink it as an intermission palate cleanser.
The race is now well under way with few yellow flags. Trying not to duck
when viewing from the “Gopher Cam” feature Fox has added is hard when
your grip on reality is already a might loose. Gordon slips out
of view and contention. The room has a warm glow. With only 50 laps to
go, on lap 178, Johnson gets loose in the corner and Steve
South, ..well, Steve gets loose in the corner too. Johnson slams
into the wall, while Steve crashes a glass into the floor and is heard
to say, “Oh, well, it’s only a Spiegelau.”
 As
the Colonel’s lamb stew comes to the table, the Chave Blancs are a lap
down behind the Chave Rouges, for after tasting the Martinelli, we shove
it to the wall and ramp up the speed with:
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Rouge) 1988
100% Syrah. Bricked on the rim, but the core has a deep, pleasing
maroon. It throws the biggest garrigue-filled nose of all of the Chaves
present. An old school syrah if ever there was one. From a big and
tannic vintage, this wine shows how Syrah can hang and hang well for
years. Black olives, smoke, smoked meats, ox tail and blood elements
flood the palate. Much bigger than the ‘89 and possessing more future
than the ‘89. Bob says this needs to be paired with osso bucco or ox
tail soup. A decidedly old school wine reflecting the demarcation
between the older style and the newer style Chaves. 13% alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Rouge) 1989
100% Syrah. Bricked from the rim to the core. A perfect example of
Hermitage and a classic example of Chave. Iodine, lavender, smoked
meats, bacon, black olive and a hint of saddle leather all come through.
Balanced, complete and very much at peak with only a bit of raisin on the
ever so long finish. No reason remains for holding this unless you just
want to see what its lifespan might be. Drink now, enjoy now and never
look back. Some sediment exhausts out. 13% alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Rouge) 1996 (in mag)
100% Syrah. Not as evolved as the 750 ml, proclaims those in the know.
The rest of us nod in ignorant agreement. A huge wine with a sweet nose.
Like the ‘98 (see below), it’s just waaaay too young to open now, but we
are thankful that Steve takes one for the team by opening this. Cedar,
black olive and bacon; all in big, bold flavors. A big, chewy wine. 13%
alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Rouge) 1998
100% Syrah. Incredibly young to be 10 years old. For all intents and
purposes, this is just too young to open .... but we are glad Steve
sacrifices one. Full bodied with loads of iodine, black olive and dark
fruits. Big tannins that are not yet resolved; loads of structure. 13%
alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave Hermitage (Rouge) 1999
100% Syrah. Almost clear on the rim shading to a deep black olive core.
It’s a big and young wine with loads of fruit and fragrance.
Interestingly, it’s not tight and much more than “merely approachable.”
Sure, it’s tannic, but not overly so. Flavors of iodine, lavender, bacon
and black olive. A wine that will go on for years and years to come.
Looking at this is like looking at a wine early in its evolution. This is
like looking at the ‘89, but only ten years into its development.
Throwing some sediment. A wine for the ages. 13% alc. Find this wine
Jean-Louis Chave St. Joseph 2003
100% Syrah. Much sweeter and New World than the Hermitage wines. Despite
its youth, it is bricked on the rim, but with a black olive core.
Excellent from a fruit forward, overly exuberant perspective; a plushy
kinda wine. If it had ears, it would look like Kurt Bush. 12.5% alc. Find this wine
With the next wine, the crowd becomes a bit touchy, for while the label
says “Chave” it lacks the requisite “Jean-Louis.” Grumbles that someone
is getting a little “legalistic” with R&RR rules rumble about the room.
Who in SamHill, a shirt-tail cousin of TomHill, would substitute
a $50 Yann for a hun’rd-plus dollar Jean-Louis, for cry’n out loud?!
Someone trad’n on trust and understanding, that’s who! Someone who knows
how to manipulate words and understand’n. Now why the room’s eyes settle
on me, I do not know, but a damn curious cold feeling takes a hold. But
hell, they drink it dry nonetheless.
 Yann
Chave Le Rouvre Crozes Hermitage 2005
100% Syrah. This is an odd juxtaposition of Old and New World showing
its cigar, tobacco, cedar on the one hand, but also candy apple. A
velvety, sexy mouthfeel. Very young, but not too young to open. Someone
remarks that, “This is a classic
Brad
Harrington wine; rich, warm, somewhat California-like Syrah.”
(Damn, that boy is good ‘cause Brad had picked out this wine!) A bit of
heat on the finish, but not so much as to make it off putting. This will
last 5 years easily, but 15 would be only a hope. 13% alc. Find this wine
Well, if someone got “legalistic” on the name of “Chave” then Steve
South got a-right smart with this next wine. Wrapped in foil, he
presents the bottle and teases us with a bit of info. Yes, it fits this
year’s theme. Yes, it is wine. And yes, it has alcohol, which is all we
really care about. As we sip and think, to the extent anyone at this
point could put two sentences together, we agree it’s Syrah. Turns out
it’s:
 Betts
& Scholl Hermitage (Rouge) 2001
Made with fruit from Chave Hermitage by some profit-seeking Aussies, not
that there’s anything wrong with that. This wine confounds the crowd
with half calling it New World and the other half crying Old World. And
why not? It’s Old World “declassified” Chave fruit from a New World
winemaker. Most guess it is Syrah, but that is as far as the consensus
goes. The fruit is sweet, but not extracted and shows nice depth and
length. A bit too much vanilla, but iodine and smoked meats are clearly
here. 13.5% alc. The exercise is most interesting for the academically
inclined. But seeing as how none of us are so inclined, we polish off
the other wines and return to watching the race. Find this wine
With 42 lead changes and Elliot Sadler making a respectable
show’n, the race is gett’n interest’n. Mears takes out Johnson
and the final restart is a shoot out with 17 million dollars at stake.
Burton is hung out to dry, Stewart dips low (fat boys
don’t hang high on 30 degree banks - gravity be’n what it is),
Black-eyed Kyle goes high just in time to give, of all people,
Newman a nudge. With that final push, Penske Racing takes a
first and second finish. Newman! In Victory Lane? And a second
place finish for Black-eyed Kyle is sweet justice, for he also
pushes Fat Boy Tony from a 1st to 3rd finish. Seinfeld
hisself couldn’t have written an ending like that!
Feeling a flushed sense of fulfillment at the Hendricks Teams
being shut down and Gibbs Teams’ rice guzzlers denied a victory,
not to mention flushed from a belly full of the best damn Rhone wines
the American dollar USED to be able to buy, we hold a little celebration
ourselves with:
M. Chapoutier Vin de Paille Hermitage 1999
The color is a deep gold. Baked apple pie and yeast aromas. Balanced and
long in the finish with a richness that goes on for hours. Wonderfully
viscous, with a filling mouthfeel without being overly done in the
least. Delicious. 14.6 % alc. Find this wine
And see’n as how enough is never enough when Rednecks get wound up, we
find ourselves opening:
M. Chapoutier Vin de Paille Hermitage 1997
Not as clear and clean as the ‘99, but with more honeyed tones,
marmalade and citrus notes. Deeper and richer than the ‘97, but with a
cloud of sediment floating around in it. The hell with the cloud, this
is damn good sweet wine. 13.5% alc. Find this wine
 Neither
of these wines need another thing, but Rednecks rarely get an
opportunity for conspicuous consumption like this, so we use ‘em for
washing down a mess of mighty fine cheesecakes handmade by Barb South
her own fine self. After a slice of one of those beauties, you’re most
like to develop a case of dun-lops syndrome (where yur belly has done
lopped over yur belt).
As we look around with the satisfaction of bears at the start of
hibernation, we revel at the start of another race season and plan for
next year’s Rednecks and Red Rhônes as the funky sounds of the
Texas Tornados’ album "Live in Austin" waft in the distance. But for
now, we reminisce about the Chaves that were. |
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